Comfort of Silence and Company

To this day I still haven't decided which of the two comforts is more, well, comforting: the comfort of silence and solitude or the comfort of company. Both have their advantages but, more often than not, I find myself torn between the two and which to settle for.

The comfort of silence allows one to examine their troubles deeper, letting the thoughts rage, drawing connections and conclusions only the chaos of one's mind would draw. While it is a dangerous path to take (for who knows what chaos may lead to?) wisdom comes from this and, to those who are good at controlling their emotions, the drawn conclusions may very well lead to order of the mind. But for those whose emotions get the best of them more often than not, as is the case with me, there is always the risk of that chaos of thought leading to destruction on a deeper level. Think of it as something perpetually clawing chunks of your mind off. Again, while this is a dangerous path to take, it allows you to face your feelings rather than storing them in various recesses of your brain.

While it may not sound like a "comfort," per se, with that description, I find it is.

I'm not looking for pity with this post but rather trying to examine the options of dealing with issues. With that said, let's look at the comfort of company.

The comfort of company is somewhat opposite. Having someone or a group of people around eases your mind, taking the thoughts off the troubles and just changing the topic. It provides temporary comfort, but once that group disperses and you are once again left alone, only your emotional control ultimately decides whether the troubles will resurface or not. The troubles may seem trivial after the fact or you may decided that it is no longer care about it. The risk of it all is going back to square one after the group disperses. There is a chance that it may simply end up as a temporary escape. Besides, there is always an off-chance of the issues re-surfacing and ruining everyone's night along with yours.

The issue with me, especially after a few past events, is not knowing whether to seek the comfort of company or remain face to face with this onslaught of emotion. Mind you, the troubles at hand have been resurfacing for almost four years now. The comfort of company provides me with escape for a while, but then something happens, and I'm back where I started with just about every negative feeling present. 

Both comforts are desired and craved by everyone. There are times when we wish to simply be left alone and times, when we are alone, when we wish for someone to be by our side. The problem is deciding which to go for when both are equal options. That is a puzzle I am still trying to decipher.